after careful consideration

i'm able to come up with a list of things that i find true about myself.

i'm one to sacrifice most things for efficiency. - i can readily give up tradition or other such wastes of energy, time, and money for efficiency. call it what you will, i call it practicality.

if i'm closed, i'm closed. - there's nothing that most people can do (lest you are deemed "l33t" in my mind) to provoke me to emotional showings against my will.

if i open up, i burst the seams. - there's nothing that most people can do (lest you are deemed "n00b" in my mind) to stop my momentum once you get me to open up to you. depends on your tastes, really.

leave it to my mind to pervert and convolute the unknown. - if you don't clarify with me, i tend to think what i would love to believe. if you never say anything, i tend to assume what i want, and then i blame you for smashing my hopes and dreams based on your own silence. constant communication is needed to tend to my psychotic little sicko of a mind. go figures.

i'm a martyr. - sometimes i feel like some things "hurts so good". creepy huh? it's not like i'm some sort of kinky weirdo BUT self-pity and other such foolishness like that is what i've grown to fall into easily. tough habit to kick. you can always try though.

i enjoy wasabi > soya sauce. - does this really need an explanation? i say the literal and metaphorical meanings are pretty obvious.

when i see, i see very well. when i'm blind, i'm totally in the dark. - it's true. i'm childish and stupid so i take things to the extremes (if you haven't noticed from all these entries so far). it's a habit i need to kick. "he who fears the Lord says 'hey, go die!' to extremities." paraphrased from Proverbs. =_._=

my mask is independence. - bust it.

i'm pretty selfish. - sometimes i ask of others what i myself don't always give. i go off into the corners to be alone, when all i want is someone to come be with me.

when i think short-term, i think SHORT-term. - that is, sometimes i find myself wallowing in hopelessness because i can't see past the clouds. you know, the sun is always up (during the daytime anyway - then again, it's always up somewhere...), it just depends on whether you've got X-Ray vision to see past the clouds or big enough mirrors. sadly, i seem to have been lacking both without you.

when i think ahead, i think ahead big time. - that means when people are looking for a quickie, i'm looking for a companion. when people are looking for a companion, i'm looking for a wife. when others are looking for a wife, i'm looking for a life with a soul mate. *shrug*

that's it so far.