war within a breath

who is he fooling? he can't possibly think that he can do this. no way. could he? will he? to wage a war on both parties, caught up in a limbo of faith. surely, this is suicide. a self-proclaimed vagrant, he continues to run from it all, never resting, always moving. retreat is his only option. he knows he faces the death penalty if he dares show his face to either side.

now, he stands firm, between the two, non-repentant. a bloodcurdling war cry emanates from one front to be rallied by one of the other. so it begins, after the aeons of waiting and watching, the silence breaks. an unrivalled genocide commences as all Hell breaks loose on the battlegrounds. war engines emerge, poised to strike as the waves of souls crash and sway in the balance.

in this sea of insanity, he stands. he remains motionless throughout. not a care to the strife around him, he seems to be lost in another world of his own. the combatants continue their predetermined skirmish for what seems to be an eternity. without warning, the sky is set ablaze as the Sun turns its face away and sets on this scene.

a Great Fire rains down upon the scene, burning all, sparing none of the damned. it washes away the remains of the dead, percolating into the blood soaked Earth, purging it clean. silence. as suddenly as it had begun, the battle has ceased. for his rejection of the Victor, he is sentenced to damnation. the End has come.

Fruit Salad!

According to recent studies conducted by an Italian sex researcher (Piero Lorenzoni), theories have been made connecting breast size and shape to specific personality traits. This is similar to astrological signs of women, using fruits as symbols/representations of the different types of breasts.

One of such fruit symbols is of course the Melon. As offended as you female readers out there may be right now, this is neither a joke nor an insult. The Melon, along with the Lemon, the Pear, the Grapefruit, the Orange, the Cherry, and even the Pineapple (!!!) are some of the fruits representing breasts which seem to have some sort of bearing (big or small) on the character, preferences, and sex drives of their owners.

It seems [hu]mankind has moved and evolved for better or for worse. We have stopped looking to the stars; instead, we look to equally fascinating objects a little closer to home for answers.

Belle Dame sans Merci

What is this power you have over me? What is it about you that captivates me? Is it your eyes? Your smile? Your sweet scent or your billowing hair? No, it must your personality, yes that must be it.

A delicate tuft of dandelion fluff, close enough to reach to but yet so hard to catch. Should I even try? Sometimes I'd wonder why. In the end, all I'll do is stand still, hoping the winds of fate will keep us together. But who am I but a fool, to have thought that something meant for free would stay here with me? I'm sure you're much better off drifting here, dawdling there, and ultimately lingering everywhere and nowhere.

info @ the P-Pole (02.21.05)

it's monday again, and so quickly too. it feels like i just posted the last list just awhile ago... but maybe that was because of the fact that i posted that one last wednesday. anyways, here's this week's list:

5 things i like sniffing:

• lotions, creams, and other pleasing scents (especially when on the opposite sex)
• the opposite sex (only with consent)
  
• spicy foods
• packages of CRACK-er Jacks
• other people's hair, preferably belonging to the opposite sex (again, only with written consent)
  

as you can see, girls smell nice (to me) and i'm just supporting their actions towards good-smelling-ness. yeah! power to the people!

*raises fist, shakes it, then leaves with head hung in shame*

Dream. Live. Die.

Dream as though you will live forever.

Live as though you will die today.

Die knowing that you've been dreaming of living forever this whole time, all the while living as though you would die today.

...

Wait a minute, what?!

info @ the P-Pole (02.16.05)

due to technical difficulties (i.e. unfinished math homework piled as high as a crackhead), this week's five have been delayed until today, as opposed to being posted this monday. so, without further adieu, i give you:

5 things i dislike:

• liver
  
• interpersonal comparisons involving me
  
• excessive occurances of cellulite
• people
  
• abuse of profanity
  

Everything, everything will be alright, alright.

The Middle
by Jimmy Eat World

Hey, don't write yourself off yet.

It's only in your head you feel left out
or looked down on.
Just try your best,
try everything you can.
And don't you worry what they tell themselves
When you're away.

It just takes some time
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine,
Everything, everything will be alright, alright.

Hey, you know they're all the same.
You know you're doing better on your own,
so don't buy in.
Live right now.
Yeah, just be yourself.
It doesn't matter if it's good enough
For someone else.

It just takes some time
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine,
Everything, everything will be alright, alright.

It just takes some time
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine,
Everything, everything will be alright.

Hey, don't write yourself off yet.
It's only in your head you feel left out
or looked down on.
Just do your best,
Do everything you can.
And don't you worry what their bitter hearts
Are gonna say.

It just takes some time,
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine,
Everything, everything will be alright.

It just takes some time,
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine,
Everything, everything will be alright.

[for all you worry-ers out there]

Exploding Whale

The Amazing Exploding Whale Video and a story about it.

hm, let's think about this one for a sec...

what's the deal with stupid people?! why are they so stupid? why do they always act like idiots are ME? i hate stupid people - or rather, the supidity behind their blank faces. there are so many varying degrees of stupidity that i don't know where to start...

well first of all, let's get the plain imbeciles out of the way. have you ever met the kind of person that would look at the WRONG STOPLIGHT, SEE THAT IT'S GREEN and START CROSSING?! i have. and i was almost tempted to say something, but a passing driver's hand gesture said it all. these people remind of a quote i read somewhere (the Darwin Awards, i think), "All people improve the gene pool, some by birth, some by their demise." - A. Chamberlain. this is true to a certain extent. but then again, if all stupid people died off in this world of ours, who would i have to compare with myself to boost my confidence? more importantly, who would i have left to laugh at?! well, monkeys could prove to have just as much comedic/intellectual value as these dolts.

i would categorize these people as "simply stupid" people. there's no explaining it, they're just naturally/phenomenally (depending on your POV) stupid. some things that i have seen that can be classed "stupid" by me include: smashing your head into - insert hard/sharp/serrated object here - [during physical activities] because of a lack of cranial protection, screaming "i can't feel my ears/nose." (can you feel your ears/nose normally? no, so don't be idiotic.), breaking a bone from frisbee (yeah, yeah, shut up. dickheads.), running head first into metal posts/other dense inanimate objects, death by elephant feaces, sentences/phrases lacking proper punctuation resulting in severely deformed meanings such as "wtf is a palindrome", people who call themselves environmentalists (tree huggers) that only eat plants (ex: trees), other self-contradictory actions/phrases/opinions (you'd be surprised how many times i've read "i think i'm good at seplling."), and homosexuals. let me explain that last one so you don't think that i'm just some teenager with too much time and/or angst.

see, you have to be pretty damned stupid to seriously think that being a homosexual will have a future. if it weren't for normal heteros like us replenishing the numbers of the gay community, homosexuals will become extinct very quickly. you have to be either stupid or horribly misinformed by crappy health teachers if you choose to be gay. i say choose because there are individuals out there who claim to be naturally gay. to them i say "don't be gay." homosexual people can't have offspring if you haven't noticed that already. how can gay people possibly expect to continue to populate the world with similar genitalia?

well, you could say "oh yeah?! we'll show you, we'll adopt." that's great, give a parentless child a warm home, except that there's one enormous flaw with this plan. that orphan came from a man and a woman just like everyone else, so don't be stupid by thinking that adopting a child somehow magically CREATES a new child out of nowhere, not to mention the harassment the kid would face at school having two moms/dads. don't you think the kids might just find it a little strange that there are TWO mothers/fathers who pick up the kid after school? don't you think they'd say something about it? i know i would. hell, i'd probably be the one leading the rest in a riot/bashing against the kid. poor kid.

as you can see, (homosexual) stupidity is mostly non-beneficial to everyone. however, there are cases of idiocy that don't really seem to hurt anyone (maybe the original initiator at most). i like to call this "laughable stupidity". although i still hate it (especially if i'm the one who's responsible), it's also usually quite humorous for onlookers. prime examples of this kind of stupidity are clips from "America's Funniest Home Videos" and stories like the "Gerbil Rocket". if you've been completely shut out from television for the past... many years, AFHV is a show where ordinary, silly people who own cam-corders mail in their own tapes of funny/"cool"/awkward/painful situations. and it is housed in the United States of America, a prime location to find idiotic material in my opinion.

speaking of America, it is also a nation widely known for our next form of dumbness, "ignorance". after watching a report by Rick Mercer, i am convinced that Americans are contending for a national Clueless Award. there is no natural way that an entire nation of people can be as uneducated about current issues as the USA. i think the main reason that they are so ignorant about the world is because they - indirectly - own the world. therefore, they can get away with "dicking off" all day and not paying attention like a smart kid in a dumb class or like a rich kid in a private class. being the richest country in the world must have gotten to them, turning them into narcissistic idiots. that's why i sometimes think hobos must be the smartest people around... not that i'm picking on hobos. hell, if you can survive on the streets lacking a roof, two showers a day/year, cash, and warm clothing, all the while fighting with other hobos for warm spots, food, or money, that's badass by my books. also note that hobos make good stew.

but here's something that's not badass: smart people (i.e. people with high IQs) who have no common sense. case in point, a proud member of MENSA bought a lock for his public storage/locker facilities. when confronted with the possibility of losing his key, he came up with an incredible idea. he locked his one and only key to the lock, thereby eliminating the chance of him losing the key. he also effectively removed any chance of him opening that lock again. the $30 heavy-duty lock would later have to be removed via industrial cable cutters. idiot. this guy is the kind of person that you hear about but you never actually meet. however, i'd like to point out that we (and by "we" i mean "you") are all guilty of stupid acts similar to the one described above but no one would ever admit it.

once upon a time i knew a foolish kid who decided that because he knew he was going to fail an exam, he decided to not show up. obviously, the logic (or lack thereof) behind this idea was horrendously miscalculated but he didn't know that. as a result, instead of getting a mark between 1 and 50, he received a 0 for that exam and he actually sighed in relief. such stupidity gives me an indescribable urge to kill something; not because he got a low mark but because he chose to bitch and bicker about his low mark to me. when such situations arise, i try to remember something a wise, old man told me and it helps me get by. it goes something like this:

"it takes 44 muscles to frown when someone angers you, but it only takes 4 muscles to reach out and slap that #@!$*& #$!@&%." - some old geezer.

now that's deep.

and now we get to the juicy stuff. a combination of both insurmisable stupidity and rock-hard stubborness can result in one of two things: either the smarter person goes home raving and angry (ex: me) or the stubborn ass goes home in a body bag (ex: you). you see, stupid people tend to have pretty extreme and very opposite consequences depending on the circumstances. it's interesting how a seemingly innocent act like yelling an obsenity in public can have such different repercussions. for example, a clever usage of an obsenity during a verbal dispute may seem humorous but taken out of that context and placed in a high-tension, political/racial rally and a brawl/riot is sure to ensue. there's a proper time and place for most things that you do; then again some things that should've never happened have somehow happened (re: my broken wrist of 2004).

if you take nothing from this article except for severe offense (that may one day lead to sanguinary violence), here are my main points: 1. stupid people are gay, 2. (see point one), and 3: Asian chicks are hot. *shrugs*

if you have any questions or comments whatsoever, please feel free to "bite my colossal shiny metal ass" - Bender, Futurama.

am i seeing double?

(left: Tom Cruise, right: Téa Leoni)

why not?

some people ask me, "why don't you ever get involved with social events (namely school dances, specifically valentine's dance)?" well the answer is simple. it is because of a carefully calculated combination of 1) me being a social delinquent, 2) me being anti-social, 3) me being an asian (a reserved Chinese teenage male to be specific), 4) me considering myself as being a social reject, and 5) me having been waging a war on valentine's day for my own personal reasons for a year now; all in proper proportions. this is why i refuse to attend such menial activities as "transferring protein strands" with the opposite sex (or not if you're into that, whatever wets your noodle). also, i have neither a date nor the guts (or balls if you prefer) to ask the girl out anyways...

beep - beep - bleep

Beginning a new semester, I got to experience some of the "finer" shades of highschool life. One was grade nine gym. apparently, I have grown fatty and unpruned. since my last gym class (all the way back in grade eight), I cannot recall running nearly as much in one sitting (or running as it was). Beep Test = survival of the fittest in action. By the end of my embarassingly few lengths of the gym, I was floored, literally. For some reason, I felt like flinging myself onto the ground, so I flung out my legs in front of me and lay down on the ground. I did not even think that there were still people doing the test and so I was harshly cursed at by another runner.

On a happier note, grade nine art class has been treating me well for the past 3 days. This period consists of 75 minutes of non-stop, hardcore, freaky-deeky fun with comments, retorts, ripostes and blatant profanity flying in too many directions at any one time. Please note that the following conversations are taking place at breakneck speed; keep that in mind while reading them (aloud with expression) to yourself/others. All dialogue is paraphrased and possibly filtered for "unwholesome" subject matter.

---

"COW!"
"WHAT! MISS! THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT ME!"
"Hey, shut up! Go eat some grass!"
"Holy sh*t..."
"Ma'am! She's using foul language!"
"Shut up, who said you could speak?! BLOODCLOT!"
"She's not repecting me!"
"Okay children, time to do a brainstorm..."
"Racist!"
"COW!"
"Bastard."

---

"CARLTON!"
"Eh?"
"What? I just wanted to say your name."
"Oh i see. But my name is Carl."
"Yeah, whatever. That other girl's gay."
"Right. What's her name?"
"Cow."
"Ah."

---

"Miss?"
"Yes?"
"Are you a Nazi?"
"What? I don't understand."
"What about a racist?"
"Um, no. I'm just an art teacher. Now if you'll look up here..."
"But you're white!"
"...If you'll look up here..."
"SEE?! SHE IS A RACIST! SHE WON'T RESPECT THE BLACK COMMUNITY. I'M GOING TO GET YOU FIRED!"
"I need to go to the bathroom!"
"You can't go now, I'm about to teach a lesson. It was just lunch, how come you didn't go then?"
"RACIST!"
"Maybe being fired would be best..."

---

As you can see, art class is horribly boring.

info @ the P-Pole (02.07.05)

5 things i will never get:

• vegetarians
• stupid people
• pregnant
• girls (open for interpretation)
  
• the Curse of the Asian Man

note: i had to make a couple of changes (and delete the first version of this). thanks to blkmage for "Sponsor a vegetarian today."

sexy first impressions

my favourite intros to songs are as follows (in that order):

• seven nation army by the white stripes (naturally)
  
• superman by blinside (oh so sexy)
• into your hideout by pilate
• kryptonite by 3 doors down
• guerrilla radio by rage against the machine
• hash pipe by weezer
  
• the girl i love she got long black wavy hair by led zeppelin (you just can't argue with sexy tabbing)
  
• i hear you calling by gob
• alert status red by matthew good
• the perfect remedy by gob
  
• hands down by dashboard confessionals

hoping for inspiration.

apparently, to some of my readers (you know who you are), my blog has become somewhat stagnant and boring - yeah right, as if it wasn't stagnant and boring to read before. i personally believe this is because nobody cares about MGS as much as me... i'm so lonely... well, i am currently reading and studying a book called "Hope Again" by Charles R. Swindoll (pronounced swindle? haha...) as a result of Hosanna fellowship's new reading program, which i initially thought of as severely troublesome but it might actually prove interesting, useful, and beneficial to me.

instead of my normal lukewarm, unenthusiastic approach to this kind of thing, this book seems to be quite entertaining and thoroughly engrossing to me, disproving arthur's theory - paraphrased from art, "boys don't like it unless it shoots, moves, or kills stuff". when he said this, i immediately thought of snakes... well, maybe the book won't be THOROUGHLY interesting, but somewhat/to a certain extent. i'm also hoping that this book gives me some "fresh air" to process my thoughts with.

"Hope Again" deals with feelings of hopelessness that everyone experiences in general but it deals explicitly with the hardships/feelings of dejection in Christian lives.

"...in a world that regularly writes dreams off as foolish and drains hope from the heart with dark pessimism, Hope Again is a voice crying in the wilderness...a word of enthusiasm for life in the midst of any difficult situation you are in."
-back cover of Hope Again

sounds right up my alley.

on another note, i'm sorry to say it but the initial rush of posts and ideas seems to have dissipated. you can expect less frequent posts due to "oppression and more pressing responsibilities to attend to" (i.e. school, i.e. math and english courses, i.e. annoying daily homework, i.e. damned educational system, i.e. "lucky me"). although i severely doubt that anyone of you is actually waiting for my next little instalment but this is just a friendly FYI/heads up (that let's me slack off ^-^).

lately...

goings have been slow and morale is low. as i gear up to return to Victoria Park Secondary School for another melodramatic semester of grade nine, i am planning several new, somewhat larger (by comparison to some of my previous posts), highly confidential projects (clearance to which my readers - yes, all two of them - do not have) planned before the end of march at the latest. being the lethargic, shell-free gastropod that i am, i will now be accepting possible smaller projects (i.e. ideas, rant topics, etcetera...) that you might want me to write about. don't get me wrong, i'm not saying that you'd neccessarily want my opinion on any and every thing, so don't give me any ideas unless you wish for me to:

1. agree with your brilliant opinion.
2. disagree with your idiotic opinion.
3. be condescending as i disprove your arguments.
4. debate with my alternate ego on your topic.
5. laugh at you uproariously.

in conclusion, to summarize this post: i am now taking requests for lack of short term ideas to write about and i'm too lazy to think of them myself 8P. HOWEVER, don't post them here, MSN me or email me. anything but posting flat out on the internet for all to see. don't worry, i'll give you credit at the end >_O.

t3h g33k135t th1n9

Our Father, who 0wnz heaven, j00 r0ck!
May all 0ur base someday be belong to you!
May j00 0wn earth just like j00 0wn heaven.
Give us this day our warez, mp3z, and pr0n through a phat pipe.
And cut us some slack when we act like n00b lamerz, just as we teach n00bz when they act lame on us.
Please don't give us root access on some poor d00d'z box when we're too pissed off to think about what's right and wrong, and if you could keep the fbi off our backs, we'd appreciate it.
For j00 0wn r00t on all our b0x3s 4ever and ever, 4m3n.

Other Quotes:

Note: Some deal with/use mature/profane subjects/language but prove to be quite humorous nonetheless. Viewer discretion is advised.

• "Is hell endothermic or exothermic?"
• "WHO?"
• "Needing Punctuation"
• "Lazy Argument"
  
• "Barnes and Noble"
• "Manliness"
• "World Issues"
• "Geeky poetry"
• "Pacman to the Rescue"
• "And the World's Greatest Parent Award goes to..."
• "I am..."
• "Feminism is currently working at 100% efficiency."
• "Retards Attempting Poetry"
• "Excessive Profanity Is Bad For You"
  
• (no comment)

Credit: All thanks to the wonderful people down at bash.org for these... interesting quotes.

Movie Review: Infernal Affaires (2002)

Review: Infernal Affairs

1 h 38 min of crime, suspense, and drama

Starring: Andy Lau, Tony Leung, Anthony Wong, Eric Tsang, Edison Chen, Shawn Yu, Lam Ka Tung, Chapman To, Sammi Cheng, Kelly Chen, Elva Hsiao

Directed by Andrew Lau, Andy Mak

A non-stop cerebral thriller...

Like the double helix of biology, the divided lives of two undercover agents are entwined in this dramatic picture. Eric Tsang – i.e. Sam, a boss of the Triads – toasts the future success of his latest recruits in their covert roles in the justice department of modern Hong Kong. Newlywed Ming climbs his way through the ranks of the Hong Kong CIB (Criminal Investigation Bureau), but is at the same time under the employ of Sam as a mole. However, Sam is not the only one playing this game of espionage: hidden among the Triads is a lone wolf, Yan, who serves as a contact and mole for the police. Only his superior (SP Wong) knows of Yan’s true identity as an undercover police officer, and so Yan’s identity hangs delicately in the balance.

After a cocaine deal gone horribly wrong (with Sam ditching all his goods to the sea) and a confrontation between the coppers and the gangsters, both parties are ill at ease and anxious to find the defect in their ranks. And so the story thickens...

Plot:

One thing this film definitely isn’t lacking is its attention to detail. One thing you cannot have walking into this movie is any form (minor or not) of ADD. Missing a minute of this movie (esp. in the starting scenes) could potentially ruin the entire film due to perplexity. This movie is simply stuffed and overflowing of cleverness. There are so many implied pieces of information that require much of the viewer’s thought that a second dosage of I.A. may be in order.

There are many plot twists and revelations that occur in the film, more than enough to please the intellectual in you. Plots and ideals are deep and metaphorical. Yan and Ming both undergo self-scrutiny, debating whether they are one of the baddies or one of the goodies. All in all, you’ll be rapt from the opening scene to the credits.

Characters:

With the story focusing on the events and thoughts of Ming (Andy Lau) that take place throughout this dangerous time, a good deal of character development takes place with Ming making a decision that will determine his future with absolution. However, an equally large amount of screen-time is given up to the development and inquiries of Yan (Tony Leung). Both men play their parts wonderfully to tell a dramatic story of two lives destined to cross as they try to find their true identities.

Music:

The tracks and their scenes blend together perfectly to create the desired mood and atmosphere. I particularly enjoyed the rare and delightful instances (Ex: during one of the opening scenes) where there was grudge-like/slightly heavy guitar riffs tearing it up in the background, oddly reminiscent of “When Worlds Collide” or "Going Under or even “Hash Pipe”.

The bottom line is that if there is an Infernal Affaires Official Soundtrack, I’d buy it in a heartbeat.

Overall:

Infernal Affairs is a must watch for anyone who’s anyone who can either understand Chinese or Mandarin OR is content with reading subtitles. As a testament to this film’s excellence and appeal, an English remake is secretly planned for the very near future. Obviously, the remake will have nothing on the original, but Leonardo Di Caprio is allowed to try >_O. I personally own IA, IA2, IA3 (Director’s Cut/Extended Version) on DVD and I watch them all whenever I can. Infernal Affairs is quite possibly THE best thriller/crime/drama ever made, but that’s only my opinion.

the llama song.

click title to experience music the way it SHOULD be.

The Llama Song
by: Burton Earny

here's a llama.
there's a llama,
and another little llama.
fuzzy llama, funny llama.
llama llama duck.
llama llama cheesecake.
llama tablet, brick, potato.
llama.
llama llama mushroom llama.
llama llama duck.
i was once a tree house.
i lived in a cake,
but i never saw the way
the orange slayed the rake.
i was only three years dead,
but it told a tale:
and now listen, little child
to the safety rail.
did you ever see a llama
kiss a llama on the llama?
llama's llama tastes of llama.
llama llama duck.
half a llama. twice a llama.
not a llama. farmer, llama.
llama in a car. alarm a llama.
llama duck.
is it how it's told now?
is it all so old?
is it made of lemon juice?
doorknob, ankle, cold.
now my song is getting thin.
i've run out of luck.
time for me to retire now,
and become a duck.

note: it took me upwards of 30 minutes to carefully catch and record all the lyrics. please tell me if there are any necessary corrections needed.

the HALO jump was nothing short of...

coolest. entrance. ever.
(HALO Jump/Dive - high altitude low opening jump/dive)

it's official. i have successfully finished a run-through of Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater @ 12:49 pm. here are my results:

Difficulty: Extreme
Play Time: 7 : 34 : 16
Save: 68 times
Continue: 0 times
Alert Mode: 0 times
Humans Killed: 135 people
Seriously Injured: 21 times
Total Damage: 4 life bars
Life Medicine Used: 5 times
Plant and Animals Captured: 34 kinds
Meals Eaten: 39 meals
Special Item: None

Title: Tsuchinoko (captured and kept the special Tsuchinoko snake throughout the game)

New Items Obtained:

• Single Action Army
• Patriot
• Camera
• Stealth
• Infinity Face Paint
• Tuxedo

if only i had my camera to take a real photo of these stats (i.e. 0 alerts/continues on EXTREME). i searched all over for my camera, but apparently my dad had taken it without notifying me first. my next thought was to see if the results would burn-in into my television set. i realized how much trouble i'd get in for doing that so i kicked that idea.

luckily, i saved after the results on a different file so that i can see them again (after about 30 mins of CG's and another 10 of credits, T_T)... very soon i will upload an unedited picture of these stats as cold, hard, definitive proof of my 135 kills which i should be ashamed of since it is a tactical espionage game... my normal playing style would resemble that of Rambo, run in with guns ablaze, but after discovering the joy of actually outsmarting the guards with or without force, i'll never go back. but still, no alerts on extreme? i'm glad that's over.

speaking of over, it struck me as being slightly queer that all my recent posts have been wussy and unmanly. they've been focusing mainly on feelings of affection and infatuation and blah blah blah. so, in fear of being considered to actually have feelings and to be touchy and emotional (which isn't what a male should be like), i have decided to switch gears and stay away from that general area for awhile.

let's see... what's there to talk about...

*silence... tumble weed*

hm, well, for one thing my arm hurts. yeah... uh, and i'll leave it your good judgement as my readers to decide whether this injury was sex related or not >_O. there, seems manly enough.

note: completed my markhor rank successfully on 02.04.05 @ 13:45. to see this run's results, click here. i received my much awaited EZ Gun for my efforts. woohoo. also note the +300 kills... boy that was fun. now, no more metal gear for awhile, lest i grow tired of this game... yeah right. while we're on the topic of snake eater, there are two parody videos that were officially published by konami japan.

• HALO Jump Video
• C3 Bombing Video
  

EDIT: uploaded pictures of my results and items earned. i am currently working on a markhor rank run (all animals/plants/misc. foods in the game captured in one run) to get the EZ Gun (infinite suppressor/ammo, laser aim).

EDIT: uploaded a second set of pictures of my markhor run.

EDIT: added links to the official konami parody movies of snake eater.

exposure

things that i haven't done/experienced yet (but would like to eventually) include:

1. undergoing severe cramps and respiratory afflictions caused by laughter
2. training martial arts such as ninjitsu, capoeira, judo, and/or iaido
3. having extreme adrenal rushes caused by activities such as skydiving, free jumping, extreme curling, or being robbed at gun point
4. being involved in a serious relationship with the opposite sex
5. watching the boondock saints, garden state and napoleon dynamite, movies prescribed to me by herman
   
6. being in a small independent band that will break up after the first album bombs
7. single-handedly writing, producing, and directing a small film that gets nominated but loses in the end
8. feeling good about myselfmarrying someone female, preferably with big eyes and red lips
9. dying
10. getting in a rude and violent dispute with a superior at work and yelling "you can't fire me! i quit!" before leaving their office
11. making money to buy diapers, baby food, and pacifiers
12. having twins, a baby girl and a baby boy, named anastasia and superfly

things that i have done/experienced already (that i wish i hadn’t) include:

1. eating 3 servings of lunch aboard a cruise
2. getting hit by a sheet of road filth when a truck passed by
3. getting hooked on phonics
4. beating up that kid at summer camp
5. getting shot in the eye by my older cousin: kelvin, who was boasting a 12 mm air-soft handgun at the time
6. being dumped
7. breaking up with someone
8. eating black liquorice

piracy.

a list of some of the albums i am considering for purchase:

• antics - interpol
  
• chuck - sum 41
• fever to tell - yeah yeah yeahs
  
• garden state - ost
  
• get born - jet
  
• hot fuss - the killers
  
• it dreams - jakalope

a list of some of the albums i already own and my favourite song(s) on each:

• caught by the window - pilate; overrated, mercy, perfect thrill,
  
• detox - treble charger; the downward dance, the first time
  
• elephant - the white stripes; little acorns, girl you have not faith in medicine, in the cold cold night, seven nation army (a must)
  
• how to dismantle an atomic bomb - u2; all because of you, crumbs from your table, love and peace or else
  
• the battle of los angeles - rage against the machine; calm like a bomb, guerrilla radio, sleep now in the fire, war within a breath
  
• the beautiful letdown - switchfoot; adding to the noise, ammunition, gone, more than fine
  
• the world according to gob - gob; 144, desktop breaking, i hear you calling, pinto, sleepyhead, the perfect remedy
  
• white blood cells - the white stripes; fell in love with a girl, i'm finding it harder to be a gentleman, offend in every way
  

johnny senior tells all!

conversation taken directly from metal gear solid 3: snake eater, after snake is stripped of his equipment, beaten adn tortured, and thrown in a prison cell.

-groznyj grad, prison chambers

"hey, you're not such a bad guy after all. i - uh - i guess not all americans are dogs."
"you mean it?"
"yeah! you know, before the war started, i used to live in america. i even had a - a wife and a kid."
"you must be pretty lonely."
"yeah... i am pretty lonely... REALLY lonely."
"what's your kid's name?"
"johnny."
"johnny... nice ring to it."
"really? you like it? well, if you say so, i'll believe you. actually, my name is johnny too. all the sons in my family are called johnny. my dad's a johnny, and my son's son will probably be a johnny too."
"a whole clan of johnny's..."
"why do we have a cold war anyway? our two countries used to be such good friends."
"yeah, i hear ya."
"sigh, i just want to see my family again."
"...must be rough."
"yeah... not as rough as you have it though... here."
*hands snake a case of cigars*
"i filtched them from your equipment, when the colonal wasn't looking... it's - uh - the least i could do."
"thanks..."
"well -"
"don't suppose you could let me out of here...?"
"huh? i can't do that! ...hey, don't you go getting any funny ideas! if you try escape i'll... i'll have to shoot you!"
*waves AK-47 at snake*
*nods and raises hands in surrender*
"i - i've said too much. i gotta go."
*grunts in disappointment*

i see you walking down the street...leaving already?

one day an aeon from today, we'll cross paths again. we'll give each other the mandatory nods, ask one another "how are you?" and by now we won't know what to say. you'll find that i've changed, as i you. but all that is secondary. all i know right now is that i'm hopelessly in love with you, but you know nothing of it. i wish i could talk with you twenty-six hours a day. i wish i could walk with you nine days of the week. i wish i could wake up to your face three hundred sixty-seven dawns of the year.

i love your fathomless eyes scintillating with cunning. i love your wavy hair and your curvy hips. i love your stunning smile and your elegant poise of a refined woman. i love your readiness and ability to perk my spirits. i'm scared that i'll never talk to you again, never walk with you again, never wake up to you again, and it's killing me. but it's the price i pay for coveting things that just don’t seem to be in the cards.

i see you walking down the street. as usual, you’re oblivious to me, happily hanging on to his arm. it takes me all the reserve i can gather to stop me from yelling out. how could anyone else possibly appreciate your charm as much as me? but you seem to be so happy, draped across his arm, like a gaming prize, and so i stand there, the air growing colder, staring at your back as you leave me once again...

“this place is so empty.
my thoughts are so tempting.
i don't know how it got so bad.
sometimes it's so crazy that nothing could save me,
but it's the only thing that i have.”

- pieces - sum 41

challenges...

for one thing "metal gear solid 3 : snake eater" is proving to be quite a challenge on the "extreme" difficulty. several changes to enhance the gaming experience/level of difficulty include:

note: the following is based on comparison from HARD mode to EXTREME.

• increased number of guards
  
• increased rate of stamina consumption
  
• increased damage taken from enemies
  
• increased field of view of guards
  
• increased sneakiness of bosses
  
• decreased predictability of guards' paths
  
• decreased efficacious time-frame of stuns/tranquilizers
  
• decreased ammunition capacity
  
• decreased amount of ammunition lying around
  
• decreased backpack carrying capacity
  
• severely decreased amount of health

all this means is that the amount of fun in attempting a alert-less, continue-less, and kill-less game is multiplied by one trillion. being the impatient asian male that i am, i have already given up on the kill-free criterion i set out with - i ran out of tranq darts, how can you blame me?! i figured a bullet in the skull would be just as good to keep 'em quiet...

on a less geeky note, exams for me are over:
friday

• science @ cafeteria, 0900 hours
  

monday

• french @ cafeteria, 1300 hours
  

tuesday

• business @ cafeteria, 0900 hours
  
• geography @ room 308, 1300 hours

woohoo, go me! now i have three whole school days at home free from responsibilities and full of metal gear solid-ing time! i AM obsessed with this tactical espionage action game franchise, but who cares? in my opinion it proves to be a much needed stimulant/depressant for my mind. rationalizations for why i love metal gear solid games include:

• quotes like the following:
  
  "I hear it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm, in flap-jaw space, with the tuning fork, does a raw blink on Hiri-Kiri rock! I need scissors! 61!"
  -ross cambell, MGS2: Sons Of Liberty
  


• overthetop characters ranging from severely bad-ass - i.e. solid/liquid snakes, revolver ocelot, gray-fox, and the compulsory big boss when it comes to bad-ass'dness - to downright hilarious - i.e. johnny sasaki, period.
  


• one word, realism.
  


• challenging tasks, maps, and gameplay.
  


• last but definitely not least, awe-inspiring CG sequences that leave me drooling.

note: please excuse the abuse of unordered lists in this post.

info @ the P-Pole (02.01.05)

it's monday again, and that means another weekly five about me!

5 of my favourite foods:

• sushi
• gutwrenchingly bittersweet symphonies... i mean, grapefruits
• rice (compulsory for asians)
• baby cows
• small children